I have so much to get into I mustn't delay:
The English Premier Shepherd's Pie
(In order of standings)
Chelsea - I found the perfect video to surmise Chelsea's start of the season. Watch me. Alright, so Bullet Tooth Tony is Chelsea, Cousin Avi is Manchester United, and of course the Three Stooges are Arsenal. Boris is a hard one - I think the easy selection is Liverpool but I also think Tottenham and Manchester City (in the future after the new owners, more on this later) are in the running.
Liverpool - It must be nice having Fernando Torres. It's kinda like having Albert Pujols - most of the surrounding players suck, but you know you're never out of a one run game if you give him something to hit.
Manchester City - I'm gonna throw out some names: Fabregas, Torres, Kaka, Cristiano, Buffon, Essien, Gerrard. Man City have placed bids on all of these players. I believe the word was, "audacious" bids. Apparently Abu Dhabi really, really wants to be part of the Big Four. Or at the very least, create a 35 year dynasty.
Pictured is a hotel Abu Dhabi plans to build, seriously
Arsenal - Well I was completely sure their season was over until Chelsea drew against Totts. Nasri looks like the real deal and I think Carlos Vela is gonna be last year's Walcott for me. What I mean is that I'll complain about him getting not enough playing time, and then when he does he won't really "wow," until one time on the biggest stage at the most needed time he'll come through with a play that I've never before witnessed or thought possible. Something like that.
Middlesbrough - They beat Tottenham, which was a pretty bad loss at the time. But then they deserved a draw (if not win) against Liverpool and handled Stoke who had just beaten Aston V. Obviously they'll fall off but hey, they probably won't get relegated!
Aston Villa - I'm still waiting on this team. I said they'd be good last year, I think they'll be good this year, but something isn't right? They crush ManCity, lose to Stoke and then draw Liverpool? They have Tottenham next (which makes for the 50th time I've mentioned them???) and then WestBrom, Sunderland before taking on Chelsea. I guess I'll keep waiting.
Bolton - I know ManU has only played 2 games but still, they're 3 games in and ahead of...
Manchester United - Why is it that I keep reading stories about Rooney and how he needs to change this or that about his game like he's a seasoned vet when he's not even 24 years old. I realize this is his 12th year or something but maybe he's just not that great. I can't remember the last time he's impressed me. He ruined their World Cup chances with his red card (while delirious England fans blamed it on Cristiano) and his style of play is flawed with him being 5 feet tall. I take Aguero or Tevez any day of the week and don't even flinch.
The Spaghetti A
Here are the top 7. Seven. teams after the opening weekend. In order:
Pop Quiz - is this the Seria A or Serie B? ... yeah.
So this really hot girl you've seen around in class for awhile agrees to go on a date with you. You're really pumped because it has a lot of potential but then you get stood up. However, before you go to sleep she calls you and tells you a funny story about how her car broke down. You both laugh and she apologizes. She doesn't know her plans for next week but would love to give it another go. That's what the start of the Serie A felt like.
Here's a few headlines from after the first week of play:
Real Madrid loses first game, still wins league
Messi shines, Barca misses Ninho and back of net
David Villa puts down payment on house in England
Almeria assures fans standings not a typo